Archive for August, 2006

Back in SG

August 31, 2006
Praise God for taking care of us when we are in taiwan. We never fall sick or anything. Thanks God for looking after us. Still remember the time when i went for my mission trip that almost all the team members fell sick except for a few of us. It has been a good trip for me personally as i learnt a lot of stuffs from there. It has really opened up my eyes and ears to what God is doing around the world. How the new wave of the Spirit is blowing. I have resolved a few personal issues over there in taiwan as God made me face them and not just buried them somewhere in my heart whereby i will get hurt when people mention them. Now i can speak of them without getting emotional and give God praise and glory for them. Our past no matter how shameful or unhappy are never meant to be hidden in our hearts. It is for us to learn and grow from it. It will be tough but God will give you the strength to do it as He has given me during my trip. I cannot recall when is the last time since i cried my heart out before my taiwan trip. During one of the days, i just cried my heart out to Him. At that moment, even a simple ‘I love You’ will take all my heart, soul, strength and mind to say it to God. But i’m glad i managed to say it for strength has been given to me from above. Therefore do not let your past get to you and stop you from fulfiling God’s destiny in you. There are so much more which i have no time to update. Will try my best. Right now i am worried about my phone bill cos it is going to be expensive as i have sms a lot back to SG. This is something which i cannot control myself from doing. Haha. Found a new meaning to missing in action ‘MIA’. Something only those who went with me will know. Haha.
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My fault

August 15, 2006
What is wrong today? I do not know why my friend got angry with me. At least i think so. Not like her normal self. Silent treatment. Why do i care? Cos i treat her as a friend. This is way too sudden for me to handle. That’s why they say ‘The men don’t get it’. Why must such a thing happen just before my trip?

Surrending

August 14, 2006
Lately i have been thinking and worrying about one thing. That is what if i cannot get my $1.5k back. I know i must trust God on this but sometime i cannot help myself to think and worry about this. Cos it is a large sum of money to me right now. As i think back, i realise i am not fit to be in the position to be worrying cos others have much bigger problem than me. All i can do is to pray to God for His will to be done. As long as lives are changed, it is worth it. Father, if You tell me to give up this money of mine, i will do it just for Your glory. Lord, teach me to surrender all these i have to You. Just as You have given Your Son, Jesus, for me. Teach me to give this little i have to You. The pain of Yours is something that no one could undergoes or understand. We can just feel this much of pain. Like Your ways are higher than mine and Your love is deeper than mine.
‘How precious also are Your thoughts to me, O God! How great is the sum of them! If i count them, they would be more in number than the sand; when i awake, i am still with You’
‘Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.’

2 more days

August 14, 2006
That’s right. It will take another 2 more days before i am flying off to taiwan. I am very excited about this trip. Still do not know what God is going to do there. The other thing i am happy about is that Dylan now is considering about his religion. Sooner or later, he will have to make a choice of what he wants to believe in. I’m glad now that the choice is between catholic or chrisitanity. Either one he will come to know God so i’m very happy. God is doing some much to those people around me. He is showing Himself to the rest of the world that He is God. Whatmore can i say? All i can do is be still and know that He is God.

Amazed by Your grace

August 11, 2006
Spent the whole day chatting with aldrich on msn yesterday. Do not get me wrong i am still carrying out my work faithfully. Not those who will slack away with anything done when i am outside maybe at home i will. I’m really amazed at God because even aldrich has begun to come to know God. Though still searching on a journey himself but it’s a good thing. Cos God’s grace has come upon him now. Felt happy for him that he is attending a church. Joy just spring from my heart. Someone close to me has begun to know God. Truly salvation is going to fill the whole earth.
To all my dear friends: For those who are still rejecting God right now, i sincerely ask from you that you will give God a chance to let Him touch your hearts. Do not throw away the salvation that He has for you all so easily. Come and experience! Do not wait until the end of your life journey and then live to regret it. Do not be like me who has rejected Him for 10 years until i truly accepted Him in my life. I am really thankful that i can still come to know Him. For i am a great sinner who is washed clean by His blood.

Back to work

August 10, 2006
After one day of so called rest which i did have much also. Here i am once again sitting at my area and typing out this. Trying to recollect my thoughts once again. I have just met a friend from my sec school days this morning. The strange thing is that i have met him before this week when i was on my way down to the airport. For this two occasions, i forgot to ask for his handphone nos. Forgive me Lord. Deep down inside i knew when i met him on tuesday, i need to invite him down to church. I know You have seen me trying to call his house nos which i can hardly remember but it was changed. Therefore You have given me another chance today but i forgot to do it. Father, all i ask from You now is one more chance for me to get his nos. Invitation for salvation need to be send out to everyone but if they choose to reject that then there is nothing i can do. Only You can make it happen, God. I am also gladful for the things You have done yesterday. I knew when i left church yesterday, You have already planned what is there for me next. But i did not listen to You and took a cab home instead of a bus. You have planned out in such a nice timing that if i took a bus home, i will have just met up with her after i alighted. Nevertheless it is still ok. Only money is lost for me in this case. Thank You for the few hours of chatting that we had. I believe You have great plans for her as You have seen that her heart is still set for You. Raise her up, Father.

National Day

August 8, 2006
I’m glad this day has finally arrived. The day which i have been waiting for so long. I have never wanted National Day to come for my life till i started working. It was one of the days whereby i could have a rest for all the work. Lately there is not enough time for me to rest. Almost everyday i will leave home at 7am and reach home only around 11pm. The reason is due to going down to church after work whether is it for ministry training or meeting. Most of the time i am happy to go down, just that sometimes my body is really too tired to carry on. This is also one of the main reason why i will not be going back to CCC again. There is really no more free time slots for me. If someone asks me if all these things i am doing now for God is worth it. I will be 100% sure that it is worth it. He offers me free salvation and this is the least that i could do for Him in return for His love to me. Many even i could not comprehend this love He has for the world. But i just recevied this love of His in faith.

FOP

August 5, 2006
I went to FOP for the past 2 days. Friday was with Grace and her friends and sat was with my cell group(church). The 2 days i have carried different feelings there and i went for different reasons. But i never sent Grace home yesterday so own her one. Nevertheless i know she will reach home safely cos God has promised me that. Lately i can hear God’s voice more and more clearly. I am really excited about that. Just now, i just did some silly things. But i know God is testing me cos everything came true just as He has told me after i did that. Praise God. For the 2 days, my heart was heavy but i know God is calling me to surrender my all to Him. He is going to use me for greater things. Now it’s the time for molding. Is there someone who is going to walk with me in this path?

Forgive me Father

August 3, 2006
Forgive me Father for all the outrages that i have within me. Lord, i need more love from You. I have experienced how is it like to take my eyes of You for one moment. It is so easily to be lost in the world when i am looking at myself and the world instead of You. Lord, You have always left the door to the throne of grace open so that i can look for You when i am lost or fall. Thank You, Father. Once again i am back at the question ‘Is it Your will for me to stay in the cell?’. My spirit is struggling because some people are still looking at themselves instead of You. Show them the same grace as You have shown me Lord. Reaveal to them Your truth oh Father. How is it like to deny ourselves and take up Your cross. I know that i myself have fallen short of that. I ask for Your mercy. I feel like giving up after so long. I do not know is it just my feelings as i felt that the cell has not improved much after 1 year. Seeking Your will, Father.

A bit sad

August 3, 2006
Sometimes i wonder if my friends will try to avoid me when i ask them to go to church? In the past, i will not have care so much about this and ask them to go church. Lately, God has shown me so much that time is so precious. The day when the judgement comes, what will happen to all my friends? Even so, they have some of my traits from my past when Melvin asked me to go church. I’m really glad that he asked me when i think back now. But now he is not going to church anymore. It’s my turn to help him to get back to the Lord. I wonder what has happened in between all these years. Only You know, God, please reveal to me things in the secret.